I am right v. the Monkey way

When I was a child, starting in preschool at age three, I had several adults, mostly teachers and even two strangers scold me for peeling a banana "the wrong way" or "upside down." When asked to explain how they know which was the right way to peel a banana, I recieved a number of stupid responses.

Today, I am eating a banana and My usual way doesn't work ,so i flip the banana over and peel it that other way. I hate peeling it that other way, so I posed the question to Google, "What is the right way to peel a banana."

Apparently, there are many ways to peel a banana. I am right, because the other way is called the Monkey way. http://www.wikihow.com/Peel-a-Banana

So my way is the people way and I am right and all those nasty grown ups, my preschool and mean kindergarten teacher are bunch of monkeys.

I hate Miracle Whip

That is all I have to say. I hate the look of mayonnaise. There are five open bottles of mayonnaise in the refrigerator at my office. Worse than a bottle of mayonnaise is a bottle of community mayonnaise. And there are five of them. Thankfully none are Miracle Whip.

Tytainya is back

She thinketh she remebereth her password.

Hot Bone Suckin Sauce

Oh yeah!

Ball of Fur is one today

Guess who had a birthday:



Guess who got to eat cake:



He is not a dog, he's a pig.

Everyone wants to know what Duke looks like

Well, here he is:



What breed is Duke? I have no idea. I think he's a Mastiff-Lab mix.

In any case, Duke is the smartest dog, EVER. He protects me from snakes, he kills gophers, he doesn't kill the chickens, he sraps with and kills coyotes. He even babysits Oliver. There is about eight feet of lead on a leash and Oliver must go where Duke goes.

One of the barns. Miss Kitty live in here:



We used to have chickens, but they started to go crazy and crow all night.

This is the pond Duke likes to swim in:



This is a beaver den on the side of the pond:



There are a couple of babies swimming around. They're not quite afraid of us yet.


This is totaly random, but here is a picture of my toe nails:



Quater hates feet, but I think my nails look pretty.

Love in my tummy

So one day I started cooking some rice and I grabbed some stuff laying around the house and this is what I made.

Oliver rolled a cigar

This is my little 15 lb Oliver. He is the best thing I ever spent money on. Whoever said money can't buy happiness never bought a good dog. Oliver is super happy. I didn't say smart, I said happy. I think he wakes up every morning wondering what new thing he will encounter today.

This picture is Oliver on Saturday, before he got sick. Oliver went to a BBQ at Gyro's house. Gyro and Beefcake made quite a spread. Oliver got to eat Kabab's, bean dip, ribs, bread, chips and drink margaritas. Oliver was also too excited to go potty before bedtime. He's usually really good about not going in the house and he never went in the kennel.

The next morning, I got up early to pee (drinking too much margaritas). I smelled something funny. I figured the dog farted. I went back to bed. When I finally got up, which was still pretty early, Oliver was crouched in a corner of his kennel looking rather upset. The night before I had put a fresh pillow in his kennel. There was a straight turd the width of a cigar in there and as long as my forearm on the fluffy pillow. I don't know how he let something that big out of his butt. I wrapped it up and then noticed the explosion in the back of the kennel.

It looked like someone squirted semi dried mustard on the back of the kennel. I can only imagine Oliver sleeping at night, peacefully dreaming about playing croquet with the big kids, then all of a sudden is ass explodes. He probably blew his rectum out eating all that bean dip. Good times must be paid for somehow.

Oliver is much better now. Today he got mint chocolate chip gellato (I removed the chocolate for you freaks out there). Now he is sleeping and snoring under my desk. that is love.